I am not a morning person. If the internet is to be believed, being a morning person is the be-all and end-all. If you want to be successful, happy and healthy, you need to get up at 5:00, go to the gym and drink juice made of things that should never be juiced, and enjoy it. That societal ideal is rather far from my reality, and if I’m honest, pretty far from my own ideal. In an ideal world I would wake up at 7:00, go for a run and then sit down to a full English. I also wouldn’t sweat, would be a size 8 and my hair would flow in the wind like a goddamn fairy princess. The reality is a 6:00 alarm, a scalding hot shower to convince myself that I really am awake and a mad dash out of my flat to catch a tram at 7:30. It’s a far cry from the hot-yoga-on-a-skyscraper and please-don’t-tell-me-what’s-in-this smoothie lifestyle.
For me though, it’s an achievement; I’ve always been more of a sleep in until noon kind of girl. Since a 6:00 start is now a requirement, and my boyfriend actually is one of those morning people (they exist outside of instagram! And they’re not all kale-smoothie-quaffing types!) I kind of have to get used to it. One thing I do like about getting up early is how much I get done. I find that an early morning means I do all the stuff that needs doing, even if going to bed earlier does seem to mean I get less time just scrolling aimlessly through the internet.
I’ve been an unwilling early riser for well over a month now, and I’ve started to figure out a few ways to make things just that little bit easier for lazy old me. My top tips for almost-bearable early mornings is below! Now, a few of these are extremely basic, but man have they made a difference to my life (or at least the mornings).
Have A Bedside Lamp
Yes, okay, I know this is the most obvious thing in the world, but when it’s Winter and you wake up in the pitch darkness to an obnoxious ringtone, you’re less tempted to go straight back to sleep when there’s a light on. The first thing I do, even before turning my alarm off, is switch my bedside light on. The switch for the big light is on the other side of my freezing bedroom, so that was never going to happen. For the first week or so in this flat I didn’t have a bedside light, and it made getting up that much harder. The lamp I have is a really soft, warm light, which I find is really good first thing. It’s not a harsh, white light that hurts your poor, sleepy eyes, instead it slowly gets brighter, giving you minute to adjust and accept the fact that there really are two six o’clocks in the day and you’re going to experience both of them.
Have Hot Water For God’s Sake
God, this is another one that makes me sound like an idiot. For the first few weeks in this flat I really struggled with the boiler. I couldn’t figure out how the timer worked, meaning that I was getting up even earlier to hit the boost button, which would mean I had tepid shower which just made me sad. My Mother, wonderful human being that she is, figured it out and set it to come on at 2:00, meaning I wake up and there’s a glorious, steaming hot shower ready and waiting to get me squeaky clean. Plus, when the boyfriend stops over he actually gets a hot shower instead of nearly losing a digit to frostbite.
Eat Breakfast I Actually Like
I actually joined the early morning kale-wheatgrass-just-regular-grass-smoothie club, and was all about healthy breakfasts for a while. Then I realised just how much I had come to hate it, and more often than not I was skipping breakfast entirely or subsisting entirely on coffee and fruit salads from Pret. That’s an excellent way for all your kale to go off and to run out of money very quickly. These days, I don’t go straight for the Coco Pops (not every day), but I do have breakfasts I like. Sometimes that’s my favourite, a crumpet with nutella, raspberries and blackberries. Other times it’s crumpets with spiced berries, a dollop of greek yoghurt and a sprinkle of granola, and every now and then I have plain old buttered crumpets. Are you sensing a theme? Crumpets are great and superior to toast and I will defend them forever. Best thing of all? I look forward to breakfast. I’m blow drying my hair thinking about what kind of crumpet I can have today. For real though, I do actually eat things other than crumpets (occasionally).
Have My Outfit Picked Out
Having my outfit already picked out has simplified my life and saves me at least half an hour every day. In the evening I’m rational and more awake than is ideal most of the time, meaning I can just pick and outfit I know works and be happy with it. If I have to make a decision in the morning, you can bet it will take minimum half an hour and I’ll end up with half my wardrobe on my bed in a heap. This way, I just trust past-Bethany’s judgement and go with whatever she picked out the night before. That way, the only decision I need to make is what lipstick I’m wearing (sometimes this also takes a while).
Write A List Of EVERYTHING I Need To Do
If I have anything to do in the morning that’s beyond the usual shower, dry hair, dress, breakfast, leave pattern, I have to write it down. Even if it’s just to empty the bin on my way out, or remember my gym stuff for after work, if I don’t write the whole thing down, in order, I’ll forget. My brain just doesn’t function fully until about 8:30. I even write down the usual pattern, with the extra thing slotted in in the proper order, because otherwise it ain’t happening.
Have A Morning Playlist
One of the best things about getting up, for me, is whacking on a bit of music to get me in the mood for the day. These are a few of the songs I’ve been loving first thing in the morning; they’re either poppy-electronic type things that make me want to dance, or chilled-out-yet-uplifting stuff. There’s nothing in there that makes me feel sleepy, and they’re all absolute tunes in my humble opinion.
That’s how I manage to drag myself out of bed every morning without crying on the tram with smoothie slopped down my front; I think it’s better that I show up at with nutella on my nose and a grin on my face. I’m not a morning person, but perhaps I can learn to be (with a little help).